Boys & Girls

I totally understand why women wouldn’t like to be called “girls.” It’s the same reason why I don’t like being called a “boy.” I’m 25, and though I may act like I’m 17 at times, I am by definition a man. Now if someone slips up and calls me a boy, you won’t see me flying off the handle. But it does bother me. I’m at a stage in my life where I’m trying to rid myself of childish things and become an adult.
But I don’t see the problem for me as much as I do women around me. Guys around me constantly refer to our peers of the opposite sex as “girls.” I can understand why women would take offense. But it also bothers me on a personal level too. Like I said, I’m 25. I’m done hanging out with “girls.” I would much rather surround myself around smart, thoughtful women as opposed to naïve, shallow girls. Plus, how can I expect others to think of me as a man when I surround myself with girls?
For me, the difference between girls/women doesn’t necessarily have to do with age. Although age plays a significant role in whether I consider a female a girl or a woman, for me, it has more to do about her personality and total outlook on life. For instance, I have met 18-year old girls, and I have met 18-year old women. Similarly, I have encountered 25-year old girls and 25-year old women.
I hold the same standards for males. Like I said, sometimes I can be downright boyish. But the point is trying to become an adult and shedding child-like behaviors. Recently, I was sitting in a steam room at the gym with a couple of guys who were in their early 20's. These guys were talking how they had come off their missions and gotten married almost immediately. Not long after that, a group of females in bikinis came in and sat down. Shortly one of the guys said to the women, “Man, I wish I wasn’t married right now.” These “boys” then commenced flirting with these women. I guess getting married isn’t as grown up as I was taught because these boys were clearly embarrassing themselves and men everywhere by trying to pick up on these girls. One of them even started doing pushups. I wanted to burst out laughing!
I guess the point of my rant is that just because someone reaches the age of 18, doesn’t mean that person can be considered a man or a woman. For me, becoming an adult is a process that doesn’t change in a blink of an eye. It takes years of learning and experimenting. Some people become adults faster than others, but if we want to be referred to as men and women, we have to stop acting like boys and girls.


  1. Way to go Tyson! What a great observation about maturity. People who are immature should be called a boy/girl when they act so juvenile. It is more important to recognize a person’s outlook rather than age. I have yet to date anyone who I would call a “woman”. People who act so petty and immature are not adults (apparently I don’t date adults, but girls).

  2. I honestly never thought too deep into this until our class discussion. I came to the same conclusion as you- I totally understand why women wouldn’t like to be called girls. I don’t always like to be called “boy,” so why would women like to be called “girl?”

    I had this job a few years ago where I was a server at a restaurant. After a few months on the job, I learned little subtle things I could do with my customers that would help me get a bigger tip. It only took one situation of me calling a table of women “girls” to learn to never do it again. From then on, I always referred to a table of women as “ladies.” Our class discussion really helped me understand why this is. Remember Tyson, Savai loves you.

  3. You are on to something. There is definitely a difference being the age of an adult and acting like an adult. Still, I think people will raise or fall to our the expectations that we set on them. I think the media encourages us to behave like children by showing characters who are completely self centered, vain, and who never grow up. That's my two cents.

  4. I agree. I find it so funny that some women will call us boys and when we call them girls they get offended. But also think that when you are a certian age it starts to get a little inappropriate to call each other boys and girls. I think it is something that everyone needs to work on.

  5. I agree with your points. I also think that just because someone reaches a certain age, doesn't mean they are a "man or woman."