Let's Talk About Sex

I have oft heard the phrase—“In Utah, time stands still”—from many people from out of state. As a native Utahn, I have taken offense to people who have trashed on my home state. But I must say that I might have to agree with those same people when it comes to the topic of sex. Sometimes I feel like we’re back in the 1950s when it comes to talking of sexual matters. It is so taboo to have an open conversation about sex, especially if you aren’t married, and definitely not with anyone of the opposite sex.
In my teenage years, I used to pal around with some girls who wouldn’t bat an eye over hearing a curse word. But if they heard the word “sex” they would freak out and call you a pervert. In their everyday language, they would say “se…” instead of the actual word, so dirty and filthy it was. I once heard my sister use that substitute and lambasted her for being a prude. My question was and is—What is wrong with talking about sex? Is it because we get aroused at the mere mention of the word?
I’m a Mormon (I’m from Utah, remember?), and us Mormons are taught that pre-marital sex is a big no-no. Until we get hitched, we’re told “NO NO NO,” and then once we are m
arried, we’re told “YES YES YES! DO IT AS MUCH AS YOU CAN!” Now I believe that pre-marital sex can be bad—especially when one is promiscuous about it. But that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t be informed about sex and be able to have adult conversations about it.
I’ve heard of a few stories of newlyweds who freak out on their wedding night because they are so afraid of taking that trip to Pleasuretown. It is a concept so foreign and forbidden to them that they refuse to take part in it and end up missing out on a little afternoon delight (I know… two Anchorman references in the same paragraph!). I don’t think that’s how God intends that to be. We should be able to have open conversations about stuff like this without feeling like we have actually committed the sin.
We should be open with each other and younger people about the truths about sex. We shouldn’t hide the facts about it until someone is married and then let that person fend for his/herself. I strongly believe that does far more damage than good.
Look… I wrote that whole thing without getting aroused once. It can be done!


  1. I agree. To many people in Utah are afraid of the word "sex." I have met people that tell me that it should only be used to make children, literally. I find it interesting how misconcieved that notion truly is. And in many ways somes up what Utah is all about.

  2. Nice Tyson. I really liked the part where you compare this culture to that of the 1950's. And I can really relate to the part where you talk about how everyone and their mothers are too embarrassed to even say the word. I have a friend who just got married and I got a call from him on his honeymoon, at like four in the morning. He was having a problem; he couldn’t “control himself”. So I tried to talk him through the anatomy of the situation, and give him some useful advice. I would bet that I am probably the only person that he knows who is sexually active (other than his parents). I could tell that he was so uncomfortable on the phone; it was even in the tone of his voice. The way that people treat sex in this vacuum culture is just so pointless.

  3. The word sex isn't the 'sin', the 'sin' is having it before marriage. It is a problem with mormons in and out of Utah. I don't think we should talk about it in a crude way, but it should definetly be talked about!